August 06, 2005

A mother again

It's been quite some time since I last posted and so much has happened.

The most significant thing is that I'm to be a mother again!

We found out on, I believe it was, April 9, that I was expecting. This truly is a miracle as we had been told that I probably couldn't have any more children due to what was believed to be the onset of (very) premature menopause. Needless to say, all of my doctors nearly fell on the floor when I said I was pregnant!

The baby, which we discovered was a boy on July 17, is due December 13. However, he will be delivered at least two, if not three, weeks early.

We have already given him a name: Jonathan Taylor Cadman Westhead.

Jonathan is Hebrew, a good Bible name, meaning "God gives."
Taylor is in honour of English missionary to China, J. Hudson Taylor.
Cadman is in memory of my husband's mother, who graduated to Glory on July 19.

We are all very excited about Jonathan's arrival, especially my older son, Tommy, who is just thrilled that he is going to have a baby brother to share his room and toys. Of course, that attitude may change once Jonathan realizes that all of these things are his as well!

It's been a very challenging pregnancy. I'm treated as high risk, not for the baby's sake, but for my own. I just spent a week in the hospital because of problems and now must make sure I rest and avoid stress. Oh, it will be a difficult 4 months coming! However, the blessings will be great, even though the trials will be burdensome!

March 30, 2005

A new quest

It's another sleepless night. I am tired, but seem to be avoiding going to bed. All I want is mindless entertainment, which I'm finding in some silly online game.

Tomorrow I fly to Boston, where I'll be seeing two different doctors, to try and fix all of these womanly problems. I hope that this will be the end of all the trouble, but I'm still nervous. I don't know what else the doctors may find.

I'm also feeling very alone; like there's not really anyone there to help me, or encourage me. My husband is here and will be travelling with me, but really, his attention will be on our son, who is also coming along.

Oh, how I hope that this will fix all these things, or at least give me a head start!

March 22, 2005

Walking away the Fibro Fog

Needless to say, the last few weeks have been rather intense, particularly due to assisting my aunt and uncle in their wedding planning, which is less than two weeks away.

It's quite amazing how quickly one can plan a wedding. Just about everything is in place. Of course, there are lots of small details to deal with, but, everything should be just about taken care of.

The whole thing has, of course, left me exhausted, and my 'fibro fog' has certainly taken over on many occassions. One thing that has helped, though, was starting a new exercise programme. Even though I only started it yesterday, I'm already feeling some benefit.

Last year, on the advice of my doctor, I began using a walking video, "Walk Away the Pounds" by Leslie Sansone. The DVD had 2 courses on it - a one mile and a two mile aerobic walking activity. However, a few weeks in, I was in a bike accident (motor scooter), and have only had my final knee surgery about two months ago. So, until now, I've not been able to do much of any exercising.

Through some Internet survey thing my husband was doing to try and win a free iPod (yeah, I know...), I ended up joining Doubleday Book Club. One of the books I got was Leslie's "Walk Away the Pounds" book. So yesterday, I started the programme. For now, it's about one mile of walking a day, which, of course, will increase gradually. The whole programme is 42 days (6 weeks, or thereabout). My goal is to be at least one, if not two, sizes smaller than I am now for my cousins wedding in June. I guess we shall wait and see.

I must say, though, that the book does give a lot of support to the DVD that I already owned. It has a built-in journal for you to write in and keep you accountable of whether you walked, took your vitamin and drank water, as well as other activities.

Another thing that is encouraging is that it is clear Leslie is a Christian, through her talk about the body being a temple and creation. Leslie, if you ever read this, I'd love to chat with you some day! Maybe we can write a book, sharing your testimony!

Well, that's all for now. Signing off!

March 01, 2005

Does it ever end?????

A mother's work is never done, and anyone who says that a stay-at-home mom doesn't work is fooling themselves.

Every time I turn around, the mess reappears in the same spot that I just cleaned. The biggest problems?? Laundry, trash, toys. Of course, we're not talking about dumping our banana skins on the floor - its more like taking our socks and shoes off and leaving them where they lay. Reading the newspaper and leaving it spread out across the floor. I'll tell you, it can drive a woman insane.

What's my solution? I haven't a clue. How do you teach old dogs new tricks? If you have any advice of nagging without appearing to nag, I'd love to hear it. Until then, my story will remain the same...

February 15, 2005

Wedding Bells

My husband and I recently celebrated our fourth wedding anniversary. Now, I am revisiting the realm of matrimonials vicariously through helping to plan my uncle's wedding. Gee whiz, I forgot how much goes into planning a wedding.

My aunt-to-be is not from Bermuda, so she doesn't know where anything is here. I'm about as busy as I was planning my own wedding, except that I'm not making the final decisions.

Unfortunately, I won't get to see the fruit of my works; I'll be in Boston on the day of the wedding. Hopefully, it will be a day that they will never forget; that it will be a beauiful day and the day will be joyful and trouble-free.

February 09, 2005

Letter Writing

The other day, I found this funky envelope that I had purchased some time ago for my son to send a letter to his Grandma in Australia. It was a thick square envelope with green foam head, legs and arms to make it look like a frog. So, yesterday, I had my son sit down and 'write' a letter to his Grandma. Then, he 'wrote' a letter to his Granny in England. We then took the letters to the post office to mail.

The whole thing excited him, and today, he wanted to write letters to his Grandma and Pop-pop here in Bermuda. We'll mail them later today.

Of course, his letters are only scribbled drawings with a note that I write, but it's encouraging to know that my son wants to tell his family that he loves them. I even try to get him to scribble in the cards I buy for his dad, from him, for the different holidays.

Hopefully, this letter-writing campaign will continue, and my little one will grow into a young man that is willing to pen his thoughts and send greetings of love and gratitude for those who provide him with so much love.

It's such an example to follow.

February 06, 2005


I watched an interesting movie tonigt. It was called, "Rosenstrasse," and it was about the story of Aryan/German women who waited in the street for seven days until their husbands were released.

It was quite amazing to see the strength of these women, waiting desperately for the hope that their husbands were still alive and in the building across the street, and hadn't been sent off to the camps. They stood in freezing weather, shouting at the Nazi guards that stood watch to give them their husbands back. Even the threat of being fired upon did not break their spirits.

February 04, 2005

Taming the Terrible Twos

Becoming a stay-at-home mom after working for the first 2-1/2 years of my son's life has its challenges. The most notable is returning home while he's this particular age - TWO.

The last couple of days have really been "one of those days" with my son, who is doing everything he can to exhert his independance. Bed time rituals have gone completely out the window this week, partly because my husband is working evenings and is usually the one to get him to settle down. Then, today, when we were running errands in town, I nearly had to go on my hands and knees to drag him out of the racks of suits he was hiding in the men's department as I was trying to talk with the salesperson.

Of course, when he got a little tap on his bottom and a stern talking to, I, according to his 2-year-old reasoning, was being naughty and "making him very angry." Naptime was equally a struggle - he sat screaming on his bed for 1/2 an hour before my husband and I finally let him out to only crash five minutes later in our bed. So is life with a toddler...

With our view of the Great Sound, we can watch the winter weather coming in from the North even before it arrives. In the last few weeks, we see rainbows almost on a daily basis as the rain comes rolling in.

As we are trying to raise our child in the Christian tradition, I try to remind him daily by asking him, "Who made the rainbows?" My son's answer is always the same: "Jesus."

When I see the rainbows, I try to remember God's promises - not only that He'll not flood the earth again, but that all things will come to an good end for those who keep trusting in Him. My son's third birthday is only five months away; he's growing daily. And all the other problems I face in relation to work, finances, depression, etc., will also come to an end.

This, too, shall pass....

February 02, 2005

A quiet moment in the afternoon

It's almost 4:30 and the house is pretty quiet.

My husband left for work a little over an hour ago and my son fell asleep while we read the Little Golden Book classic, "The Good Humour Man."

There are very few moments like this in my life, when everything is peaceful. Of course, there are things around the house calling to me - the laundry, dishes in the sink. There's also my son's room, which I started tidying up this afternoon, sorting out old toys to donate to charity and trashing bits and pieces that were broken.

I could also sit and read, scrapbook, watch TV (not cartoons, for once), or even take a nap. Instead, here I am, taking a few moments to write.

Normally, I'd be busy writing a story for publication, running around to take pictures or on the phone doing interviews. But that life has finally changed. I no longer have to worry about sitting at a desk making sure I look busy, and trying not to fall asleep from lack of sleep.

It takes some getting used to, this being a stay-at-home mom, working as a freelance writer and copywriter. It also requires far more energy than I ever realized. Keeping up with a very active 2-year-old can be challenging for any mother, especially one with Fibromyalgia, like I have. However, I'm learning to create a schedule that helps both of us.

In spite of a terrible storm that tore through Bermuda this morning, I'm feeling pretty good. We had a slow morning, being that we couldn't even go outside and I baked muffins as a special breakfast treat. I'm still a little achey, but I think that has more to do with cleaning my son's room than the weather, for a change. I hope this quiet day will continue into the evening, when I settle down to watch the movie, "Ray," and do some ironing.